Life isn’t always a straight path…..join me as I navigate along the curves and turns of receiving my MBA.  I will be examining articles that I promise won’t be boring; riveting thoughts about college textbooks and discussions about discussions.

To view my thoughts on articles, discussions and textbook chapters, please view the side panel.

This is week two of the class and our readings included a Harvard Business Review article and chapters 2-3 in our textbook.  This weeks discussion is listed below under the title “Reflections of the Girl in the Mirror”.

“Every leader is telling a story….about what he or she values.” — Walt Disney

When you are foolishly young and a senior in high school, you tend to believe that the road towards your bachelor’s degree is a straight path.  As that wide-eyed eighteen-year-old I entered college with the dream of being only the second person in my extended family (all 54 of us) to not only go to college, but to graduate also. A way of life in those hills of Appalachia, my  father quit school in the 6^th grade and  my mother finished 10^th grade.  Yet they instilled within me the love of education; the love of travel (I had traveled to forty-eight states by the time I was eleven.) and the love of God.

            Within months of starting college, my road took an expected turn.  I was pregnant and married and back to Eastern Kentucky to start my new life.  I wasn’t happy but I made the best of the life I had. I longed for true love. I keep hoping that one day I would find it.

The road I took over the next thirty-six years was as crooked as those mountain roads that lead through the valleys, up in hollows and upward to a top of a mountain and down below. The road wasn’t easy. It challenged ever thing within my being and my soul. 

            Like many women, I gave it my all even when my heart wasn’t in it. Giving 110% is the only way I know…. However, I gave that 110% to financing my husband’s hunting trips and not to my next semester of college.  I gave 110% to my two children, whom I loved more than life itself and years later proudly watched them both graduate with honors from college.  I gave 110% to my job as a para-educator, speech and drama coach and coach of the technology team that I coached. I gave 110% to my students and told them countless times to never give up on their dreams. I gave 110% to my community by conducting Miss America preliminaries and helped awarded over $2,000,000 in in-kind scholarships and watch my contestants graduate with college degrees.  As I watched so many fulfill their educational goals, mine was still unfulfilled.  That degree and that dream of mine still lingered in my mind. In my heart. In my soul.

            After my divorce and the death of my parents, I moved to the sunny shoreline of Fernandina Beach. I like to believe that the ocean restored my heart….my soul. I enjoyed my alone time however I still was searching for that one true love.

One day I woke up and finally said, “It is MY time.”  In 2013, I enrolled at Florida State College at Jacksonville and thirty-six years after that first college class I proudly walked across the stage in May of 2016 to receive my Bachelor of Applied Science in Logistics.  I know my parents were smiling down on me at that moment and so very proud of their Susie.

            I now served as the media spokesperson for the college’s Logistics program and am featured in their billboards, print ads, and on-line ads. I must admit that it is amazing to be traveling down the road and seeing your face on a billboard. Serving on the School of Business’ Advisory Council is a way I give back to the college who helped me turn my dream into reality.

            My degree, along with the eleven certifications that I hold, along with my determination, helped me to be named the first female to ever hold the position of Safety Manager at the company I work for.  Within three short years of being employed here, I am now the Operation Manger here at RDL Logistics, moving freight on the highways of the southeast.

            When I was a Para-Educator I know I made an impact in the lives of the children I taught.  Unlike other Para-Educators, I had my own classroom as the school’s Computer Lab Instructor. I loved teaching…. everything about it.  I miss it. And that is the reason the road I have been on is about to take another turn.  I want nothing more than to receive my MBA so that I can become an adjunct professor and share my knowledge, my love of teaching and learning, my experiences and to be quite honest….my broken road. I like to believe that my true love is education and the “you” in the below lyrics is my master’s degree that is waiting on me.

I set out on a narrow way many years ago
Hoping I would find true love along the broken road
But I got lost a time or two
Wiped my brow and kept pushing through
I couldn’t see how every sign pointed straight to you
Every long lost dream led me to where you are
Others who broke my heart they were like northern stars
Pointing me on my way into your loving arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you

I stare into the mirror and I look at the woman staring back at me. Reflections can sometimes be tainted. Do we really see what is beyond the mirror or do we see the version of ourselves that we want to see?

I blink.

I see a little girl placed in the gifted program in kindergarten- the “teacher’s pet” because she seems to know things without studying.

I blink.

When I look in that mirror, I see a girl of fifteen moving from the big city to the boondocks of eastern Kentucky. She stares back at me as if she is saying “What in the heck have my parents done to me?”.  Yet she excels.  She quickly learns about the supply chain when her parents open a large supermarket. She adapts to her new world.

I blink.

I now see a young woman struggling to juggle college, marriage, two small babies and teaching at the local school.  She questions herself even though she isn’t living the life she dreamed about; she gives 110%.  She inspires her students to achieve their dreams.  Yet hers are going unnoticed.  She stares back at me.

I blink.

I now see a woman who stands proud and tall.  I see someone who runs a company because she was determined to finish her bachelor’s degree thirty-six years after she started it.  She smiles because she knows that she has broken glass ceilings in the transportation industry.  She’s proven herself.  She may not always be right; however, she leads with her heart, her experience and her education.

I blink.

As I look at that reflection, I think of historical leadership theories that we have been reading about this week and wonder which one describes that woman staring back at me.  Is the “Great Man” theory more like her or are the others?  Personally, I think she winks at me and I see the wheels in her mind swirling with the laughter behind her thoughts.  Why isn’t it called the “Great Woman” theory she is thinking.  She has never been a follower.  She has always been the outspoken one.  The one to make decisions.  The one to get the job done.  Was she born this way or did life create who she has become?

I blink.

Then I stare more at that reflection and I see the theory of traits circling her being.  She has energy, passion, and knowledge. She’s judgmental. She has decisiveness. She certainly has self-confidence, integrity, the desire to lead. She is driven.

I blink.

I open my eyes and allow myself to go beyond the reflection.  I recall past experiences that lead the woman who I see in the mirror to exist.  She saw her mother as the top pay earner in the family as her proud father stood by her side.  She saw her former students, who needed her help because they had no one else in their household ask for her assistance. She saw her father, a minister, hold people problems, their hearts and their soul in his loving hands.

I blink as a tear runs down my face.

She saw her life crumble in a span of four months when her husband cheated, her father passed away and her mother was diagnosed with ALS. She saw that the mountain was going to be hard to climb.  Yet, she knew it was just like any other journey- one foot in front of the other. Not only did she climb that mountain, she went to the other side and kept walking.

She learned. She learned from others.  She learned by her mistakes.  She learned from her successes.

I blink.

I see her struggles.  She can’t spell.  She has no clue what a quantitative method is about.  She can’t tell you the difference between MLA or APA format.  Yet she goes on.  To her a leader is someone who can take a difficult situation and become stronger. She is a mixture of the “Great Man” and “Trait” theories.

I blink.

 I think of the song lyrics of Christina Aguilera song “Reflections”.

“Who is that girl I see staring straight back at me when will my reflection show

 who I am inside?”

I blink.

I open up my eyes and smile and think of another song.

“I am woman.  Hear me roar.”